Thursday, December 21, 2006

A day entails...

I like being home, dont get me wrong i love my family i like doing little things for them like picking up asparagus tips or picking mom up from work or other little things that make me a poster child for "my son is better than yours"

but i want to go back to edmonton. i miss people. especially you.

if only i could bring back my little dog...for i love him so much

have you ever had hockey skates too small for you?
well let me tell you they dont exactly feel like someone is pouring chocolate syrup on your feet and then seductivly lick it off.

no not at all!

i played outdoor hockey the other day for the first time in a long while and after the minus degree weather had its toll on my scrunched up feet i felt like i was going to cry.

so i did, a little bit, but dont worry i played it off as how i was feeling for all the deaths the "darwin awards" so jokingly writes about.
someone has died... but they are joking about it.....very morbid if you ask me.
how people look past everyday literature and blame violence on video games.

but the darwin awards are really funny so pick up a copy.

i am goign to go and eat something...thats all i do when i am home.
i am one of those people that eat when they are bored.

-matty k

Monday, December 11, 2006

i should be studying...

who else wants to drop out of school and become a hobo?

i do! ooo OOOOO OOOO pick me coach pick me!

i should really cut down on sport references, because i no longer play sports. i did the whole "quit something you love to make something of yourself" thing.

some days i regret it some days i'm glad i did, i wish my mind would make it self up.

...make it self up...yah i said it.

i really should be studying

i went to japan town or village or whatever and i had a wonderful time. there was knife tossing and food was flying everywhere.

well not really, but there was good conversation....and i tried doing that model thing where you bite on your glasses and pose like you just discovered how fun your soft ample body was.

but it didnt look like that...not at all, it looked like i was chewing on my glasses because i havent mastered using chopsticks and i needed my black plastic rims for sustenance.

oh and the people i was there with gave good company except for that dirty DIRTY, man.

you know who you are.

we wore suits!

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Shining time station

who remembers thomas the engine? i do! who could forget that abomination of nature. i mean what freaky scientist decided to put a face on a train and then animate it? and by animate i mean it in the tense of bringing it to life...not drawing.

i mean if i were to be the conductor on a train and my train started talking to me...i would lose it. my mental state is fragile enough already.

and WTF is up with those trains? they aree always getting stuck in mud puddles or something else a train couldnt possibly get stuck in if they stay on the tracks.

i remember watching an episode where thomas gets stuck in a mud did he get there?

and if he did go off the tracks, which seems to be the only reasonable explanation, how come there isnt a path of death and destruction after him? i mean for a passenger train like thomas those poor people in the back must have been bouncing around like popcorn in those metal containers you put over the stove for a delicous midnight snack.

and if the train could talk then how does the circulation system work? does he run on oil? blood? does he feel pain? I demand to know these answers.

i just wish that at the time when the show was in full swing i wrote the producers and demanded answers.

now from watching that show i think a half-train, half-human, abomination is suitable for young children.

if we think were getting desensitized by video games, just remember the saturday morning cartoons we used to watch like the genetic malformities that are the ninja turtles or the cruel imprisonment of pokemon.

think of the children......the children.

....and for the passion of the christ....

shouldnt we be concentrating on why he died and what he lived for rather then watching 2 hours of pain and gore?

-matty k

Monday, November 13, 2006


everyone i know who has seen rent has liked it. i like it aswell but i am also very critical when it comes to movies.

so here is the general plot line to the movie...

everyone has aids except for the lesbians and the lonely straight guy.

also the audience is made to go on the side of mimi when the lead actor, who has aids, turns her down.

i mean mimi has aids and is trying to force it on him. she doesnt know he has aids and he doesnt know that she does so he's just being a good guy and trying not to get her sick aswell. but she's all about giving it to him.

why feel sorry for her when he turns her down? dick move on her part if you ask me.

and at the end of the movie you feel all nice and dandy that everything works out for them in the end. except in a couple months they are all going to die...succumbing to the common cold.

i'm happy they are trying to make people aware i really am...

i feel more people should be aware abou aids.

i feel bad for lonely straight guy(sans aids) he and the lesbians are the only one thats going o be alive in a few months.

poor guy....

poor cast... that movie was a tradgedy.

-matty k

Saturday, October 07, 2006

i once was lost but now i'm found

i really like "lifesong" by casting crowns.

a new year is underway and more and more people are starting to feel the stress of the new year. homework, bills and laundry is starting to build up and our shoulders are starting to get sore from all the weight thats beginning to pile up.

who wants a backrub?

i am writting two songs right now, it seems that most of my song always seem to be on the depressing side.

song of the moment: cat and mouse by the red jumpsuit apparatus

i think eric knows where i am going with that,

recently i have felt...underpar and i have been a little cranky.

i keep telling myself that its becuase i am tired. i really hope it is.

mmmm thanksgiving dinner! thanks house of coolness for that delicious turkey.

i tried candied yams for the first time. mmmm and the turkey.

have i meantioned the turkey? it was really moist and the turkey was delicious.

mmmm turkey.

i might have broken the rocking chair that some luthern guy gave another luthern guy, i felt bad for breaking it.

i didnt know lutherns liked to rock.

i had a talk with a luthern pastor about being non denominational. and i learnt something from him. i think i'll stick with my catholic roots.

yah for the pope!

-matty k

Thursday, September 21, 2006

you me and someguy named steve

i was going to write a whole different post, just i dont thin i am ready for that one right now.

or i dont have enough time to write what i really want to.

one of the high school kids called my boss racist becaus we made him run.

my class is starting....see yah

-matty k

Thursday, August 31, 2006

they're there and yours are theirs.

so far this year has proven to be interesting. My days have been jammed pack with video games and board games....hmm maybe it hasnt been that interesting after all. but i like those things so LAY OFF!

that was an unexpected outburst.

i think i am one of those people that hold all my anger in until i yell at a cashier when i'm thirty because she gave me the wrong change.

i played axis and allies last night...i was the states...and completly useless. we'll leave it at that.

Song of the moment: "girl of my dreams" by of the most monotone songs ever in existence but i like it.

People are hard to read. especially when you feel like you dont know them anymore. i'm having a hard time figuring out people. but then if i understood everything in life it would be boring,

Its amazing how many choices you can make in a day. some you dont even know your making and others require so much thought you fall asleep before you even begin to wrap your head around it.

speaking of which i have a head ache..

I have a good feeling about this year. i dont know if its the people or if i feel like a different person, or maybe its both. yes i think this year will work out for the best.

i dont like church songs that involve the organ...i think the organ is the worst sounding instrument ever.

dont get me wrong, some of those youth songs i really enjoy, but when they steal the rythm from other songs *cough* eye of the tiger *cough* it doesnt appeal to me. *cough* my sharona *cough*

seems like i'm getting a cold.

High school kids take sick days for granted. i remember when i was in high school, the rule was if i could walk i'd be going to school. some of these kids get a sore throat and they think they're coming down with cancer. if i got a sore throat i'd get a mint, a glass of water, and a boot out the door.

i love my parents. the best was when i got in trouble i would do physical labour. or run till i threw up. I got in trouble one summer and got signed up for an advanced power skating class.

it worked better then getting sent to my room or "being reasoned" with.

i dont know why spanking is so controversal. some times physical punishment is necesary, i'm not talking about causing a bloody nose or breaking of appendages but when i got spanked i didnt do it again.

this is getting long. i also have to call my brother. he turned 22 today.

-matty k

Thursday, August 24, 2006

one shin splint to many,

i started jogging. and my shins and thighs hurt. but when i get in shpe its gooign to be good.

i tire of this blog thing, i am goign to go. and command and conquer the western europe.

-matty "sore thighs" k

Monday, July 31, 2006

Bugs and false teeth

My office is swarming with aphid looking bugs. but bigger. i think i can see their fangs and compund eyes staring at me..

anywho...last night i was witness to a fight just outside the Earl's closest to my house.

these two guys dressed in sideways hats and basketball jerseys driving around in a work truck were just looking for trouble.

this is how it all started...

my 5 friends and i were enjoying a nice dinner at earls, each trying each others food item and selection of alcohol. then when one of my friends spotted a friend he hasnt seen in a while and started calling his name (more like hey F***head! over here).

In comes... i'm goign to use the term white surburban kids trying to be gangsta's or WKTG for short.

"what the F*** did you say to me" -WKTG
"nothing i'm trying to get a hold of my friend...hey F***head" -friend
"i'm gonna knock out all you white kids teeth"
*this is when in started laughing because they themselves are white, and had a lack of teeth*
-also it did not help out the situation-
*sits down in a chair next to us*
"next time you say something like that your going to pay" -WKTG
"dont start sh*t with me muthaf**ka, you dont know whats going to go down"-Friend

*again i laughed because my friend is also of the WKTG type....again did not help out the situation*

profanities were shared and the WKTG left to hang out in the parking lot to wait for us. deciding i wasnt in the mood for a fight...well at least not on an empty stomach i convinced the larger kids of my group to calm down.

half way through our meal we look up to see the WKTG getting their asses handed to them by two bigger(lets call them preppy) kids. like had to walk through doors sideways big.

anywho to make this already long story short the two preppy guys grabbed both of them by their collars and pummeled their face until both of the WKTG fell limp.

hilarity was ensured and while they were licking their wounds in the parking lots complaining it wasnt a fair fight thats when my group of six walked out to the parking lot to meet them for our "ass kicking"

so then it was six of us and two of them who were badly bruised and cut.

more prodfanities were exchanged and the WKTG left in their broken down work truck.

oh the sweet taste of almost victory.

then i chipped my tooth on a chop stick.

-matty "no tooth" k

Thursday, July 27, 2006

It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time

That is by far the best line i have ever heard....that and the line where some guy said that a guy with no arms could do a betetr robot than ashley simpson. oh hilarity was ensured.

I have alot of lactic acid buildup in my leg, i can tell becuase my legs are burning from walking from my car to my office. Maybe when darren and neal were telling me i'm fat they werent lying.

well according to the bio mass index i am overweight.

i am re reading the lord of the rings and i am currently on book four. And i think that gollum (smeagol)is a dick. such a dick. all he wants is that supid ring.

and remember kids, not all elves are tree hugging hippies and not all dwarves are alcoholics. Just most of them.

-Matty "The guy who got a 30% on the geek test" K

Monday, July 24, 2006


i am officially the worst typer in the history of people typing things. ok well i wouldnt go that far but i am one of those index finger typers. you know they can only use there index fingers for every key?

but the weird thing is, im actually kinda fast at typing with just two fingers. faster then some of those " home row" show offs.

The pilots around my work always complain. they want to fly all day but no one wants to flylate. there are 14 people trying to get into a space thats only meant for 6 and are dumbfounded when it doesnt work. and by pilots i mean the students not the instructors. the instructors are cool. one of them just answered the phone for me.

The Day one of the students doesnt complain about the schedule is that day that i can bark like a chicken.

hey it could happen.....

-matty k

Thursday, July 13, 2006


a handshake says alot about a person. i think a first impression is dependant on the handshake.

if you want hair that looks like a silky poofball sitting on top of my head, use conditioner.

recently have i learned that boxer briefs are they way to go, tight, but not to tight. i think santa clause wears boxer briefs.

playing guitar makes calouses, if you want perfect hands...dont play guitar.

if you stare at a wall long enough you can find shapes in those little bumps. its kinda like looking at constellations.

the humidex and temperature are not the same. they are very related but not the same

Monday, July 10, 2006

synopsis of my life

How long do i have to stare at this wall to know that i feel nothing. well at least not right now, nothing seems to affect me. i guess you can only take so much before you become numb to certain things. i guess what i'm trying to say is that i dont care.

no not anymore.

well at least not right now.

things seem to stack on my shoulders, but before where i would cringe from the weight, i sit here staring. i just dont care.

no not anymore

well at least not right now.

my eyes seem to glaze over when trivial problems arise, i just dont care.

no not anymore

well at least not now. least not now.

-matty k

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Poetically Pathetic

I saw the most beautiful sunset today. the yellow orange glow through the morning haze was unbelievable.

I was writting a sont the other day...well trying to...and as line sprang to mind. its probably been said before but i dont care..

"You can only ruin something perfect if you want more"

I think i am going to use it in the lyrics. it works on so may=ny levels and you can apply it to almost anything, its kinda like one of those hogwash horoscopes.

i must apologize for being so emo-y, i would blame it on teen angst but i am not a teen and i do in fact not hate my parents. and the treated me well...they make me coffee in the morning.

Plus i tried the whole leave-nothing-to-the-imagination pants and the paint-your-fingernails-in-a-van thing. both didnt work out because i got fingernail polish everywhere and i couldnt sit down.

i dont know how you emo' it.

-Matty "the ops guy" k

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

bored at work

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you're told that you're loved.

You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was insecure and in constant need of reassurance.

Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage something you've always wanted... though you haven't really thought about it.

In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily.

Your Porn Star Name Is...

Private Dick

You Are an Emo Rocker!

Expressive and deep, lyrics are really your thing.

That doesn't mean you don't rock out...

You just rock out with meaning.

For you, rock is more about connecting than grandstanding.

Monday, June 26, 2006


Holy man has it been along time, my computer is finally beginning to work at its full potential, and i can now do other things besides msn.

I miss Thamior...its been so long since i have seen his green eyes sparkle in the moonlight. Seems like forever since i've seen him make his arrows sing with his +1 Composite long Frost bow.

And wolfie his faithful wood beast, how long has it been since i have seen him frolic in the long grass with his dear friend weeble. oh weeble! the rest of the companions and the adventures we've had, will we ever enjoy each others company while convering and enjoying a mug of ale? will we ever slay another juvenile dragon? each to their own and to each there is....alas....withdrawl

-matty k


Holy man has it been along time, my computer is finally beginning to work at its full potential, and i can now do other things besides msn.

I miss Thamior...its been so long since i have seen his green eyes sparkle in the moonlight. Seems like forever since i've seen him make his arrows sing with his +1 Composite long Frost bow.

And wolfie his faithful wood beast, how long has it been since i have seen him frolic in the long grass with his dear friend weeble. oh weeble! the rest of the companions and the adventures we've had, will we ever enjoy each others company while convering and enjoying a mug of ale? will we ever slay another juvenile dragon? each to their own and to each there is....alas....withdrawl

-matty k

Monday, May 29, 2006

TELUS world of crap

i went to the telus world of science buildng today, and did it ever suck ass. i remember going to the space and science center when i was in grade one and it was way cooler then this piece of crap telus is trying to pull.

i mean they have people blowing up ballons in white lab coats explaining that pressure goes from high to low. you dont need a lab coat for that

i earned the right to were a lab coat by disecting fetal chickens and picking apart dead stuff to wear one of those proudly.

and i sport it well, not like those imitation scientists where the refer to erlenmyer flasks as beakers. as beakers!!!!!


he then put a ballon in a bell jar took all the air out of it creating a vacuum and when the ballon grew and eventuqally broke he called it magic!

thats not magic thats air trying to escape!

i wish i had a fetal chicken to throw or some sort of chemical.

-matty k

the only thing that made it fun is when the ballon (named sparky) blew up and one little girl yelled out "make another sparky"

yah that was funny

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

my worst brings out the best in you

since now that i am twenty i am very worried about being that "creepy old guy" at any social functions

particularily the high schoo graduation banquet...where the only people that know me are the the high school boys that live in dorm.

so then of course when i went to them there was 15 weird looks given at a 16 person table.

plus my pants were to tight and i can imagine they did not leave anything to the imagination, and my shoes were to big.

i must have looked like a clown, going to a porn shoot (do porn stars where tight pants?)


i gained ten pounds a little while back and since them i have been referered to as the "fat kid"

even by the guy that used to be called the fat kid

but i hold it well, it keeps me warm during those brisky canadian nights.

i think i wanna take dancing lessons...maybe the tango or the salsa

then i wouldnt look like an orangutange on a week long coke binge when i dance.

-matty k

Monday, May 15, 2006


i hate those emails that 100 people you dont know send them to you saying that if you dont forward it in the next hour something will or wont happen

i'll give everyone a little piece of advice...

nothing will happen, dont worry

if you dont send it to 10 people you arent going to die nor does it mean you dont love jesus

those are the worst when they send you an e card with regards to god and if you dont send it agin you hate him

well i never send those things and i think gods cool with that

i just got one saying "what he really means"

it had stuff in it like if you are msn and you use black writting you are falling in love


i use black all the time and it doesnt mean i am falling in love with the person i am talking to

argh hog wash

-matty k


Friday, May 12, 2006

halls of the bloodfeast

today i watched a friend play that new game called oblivian. the game lay is aright but the names it has for some places are kinda grotesque. names like blood hall and halls of the bloodfest and blood feed. it sounds like they are trying to desensitize us more then they already have,

so this is my question to you....what is worse? having a slashing game where you kill trolls and other ugly creatures or having a game meant for elementary school children where you hack and slash cute little monkeys that throww banana peals at you?

i have to say the second, i mean they cry when you hit them

it makes me feal bad but its soooo fun to play
i want comment on this

is there any benifits to being desensitized? i think there is by the means of not being as scared when watching a scary movie

what are your thoughts?

Thursday, May 11, 2006

second entry number three

wow it is only my second entry and i had a hard time coming up with a new and exciting title. it doesnt make any sense to me and i guess thats kinda what i was goin for.

modest mouse is a good band


so today is my birthday, i am no longer a teenager, that kinda makes me depressed, but hey i am gonna get presents today so yah for me (thank god for parents)

the good thing bout being 20 is that i can now be called that "creepy old guy" when i sit in on mcdonalds mcbirthday parties..

oh how i cant wait

i'm going to mongolian grill later today, maybe some of my friends will show up. i think the reason why people go to restaurants for their bday supper is so that if no one shows up they can still get something to eat. i wonder if they'll have ice cream

i walked to 7 11 the other day, isaw a beetle on the ground andi stared at it for the longest time. the peson i was walking with must of thought i was high because when i saw it i screamed (cool! a beatle!). did i tell you i'm 20?

i think the older i get the stupider i become...or childish...yah i'm going with childish

i have to keep pretending i'm smart or neal will stop hanging out with me

the end

matty k

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

a new start

ahh real monsters! remember that old show that used to be on YTV after you got home from school? i favorite was the black ad white girl stick thing, and the guy that held his eyes in his hands.

i wonder if he ever lost them?

so this is my new start my new chance to finally keep a blog going for longer then a few weeks, my last excuse was that i had nothing to wrie about but i lied..

i lied and i i'm sorry

revelations 21:8 springs to mind


so now since all my fellow dormies have moved out all i have to do now is work one day a week at my second job and fill the rest of my time staring at the wall trying to find pictures in the little bumps.

so far i am unsuccesful

my birthday is coming up in a few days, the thing that i dont really want to do is get so drunk and throw up in a bathtub.

i did that once...for my 18th birhtday party, the only thing i remember is throwing up in the bathtub and telling my mother how much i loved my girlfriend.

well i'm done for now, i am going to go watch the west wing....josh is my favorite!

-matty k